I received this feedback recently, and it struck me how similar it is to what fat people hear about their lives. So many in world want fat people to be miserable because of how they look. If a fat person “dares” to live their life exuding confidence they are told they act happier than they really are, or at least happier than they should be.
There is this idea in the world that you have to have certain things, or be certain things, to be happy. I have to be a certain weight and look a certain way, before fat shamers think it’s okay for me to wear a smile (not to mention horizontal stripes or contour dresses). That’s why they think it’s glorifying obesity anytime someone overweight is seen in the media doing ANYTHING other than crying.
I can go out on a dance floor and enjoy myself, because my goal is to enjoy myself. I’m not blind to my lack of skill set. I certainly have no delusions of grandeur about entering a dance competition anytime soon. The same philosophy goes for life. I don’t always know the right steps to take, and I’ve been known to stumble through difficult situations. That doesn’t change my worth, and it certainly doesn’t have to take away my smile.
There will always be a panel of self-appointed judges in the world. They will sit on the side of the life’s dance floor and critic everyone they see. Since I started this journey, I’ve stopped dancing, or living, for them. What they think of me is none of my business. What matters is if I’m dancing my way through life in a way that makes me feel happy and fulfilled. As long as I can look myself in the mirror and give myself a high score all the categories that matter (Am I a good person? Am I good mom? Am I good wife?), then I’m winning the only mirror ball trophy I care about.
I don’t mind admitting that I smile when I think of the self-appointed judges of the world. I like to think I try to bring happiness to everyone I meet. And, if snickering about my dance and life makes people happy, then I’m glad they are watching. It costs me nothing to make them smile.