Maybe it’s the fact that I just finished watching Jon’s Stewert’s final show, but I’m feeling nostalgic. I suppose it was bound to happen. I turn 30 in three days. In some ways, the festivities start this evening. Tomorrow there is a party with my family and friends. Then sunday, some of my closest friends are joining me on an overnight trip into the wilderness. I will be spending my last day in my 20’s exploring waterfalls and around a campfire. I’ll be spending my first day in my 30’s waking up in the woods.
It makes sense that I have been distracting myself with planning this weekend for over a year. It’s been easy to ignore the reality of the situation when burying myself in details, woodworking projects, and over-posting on the event page for my birthday party. But, as I sit here still feeling the sting from The Daily Show, I can’t help but face the reality.
I will be turning 30 in three days.
Society has trained everyone that your 30’s are a whole new ball game. You are expected to have your shit together. You should be knee deep in your career, and successful.
There is something about facing my 30’s I didn’t expect. I really am starting to leave the angst of my young-adulthood behind me. It really becoming easier to embrace who I am as a person, instead of trying to change myself so much. I’m finding comfort in my skin, in my personality, and in my world view. Because of this, 30 doesn’t really scare me.
I’m excited for what I have ahead of me. It’s that sweet spot in the life cycle where your age rarely gets in the way of anything. Your not too young to be taken seriously, and not too old to learn new tricks.
I also have a new appreciation for time. It does seem to be going faster. I feel like I was hiking Proxy Falls for my 29th birthday just a few months ago. I feel like my son was just a little baby yesterday. I feel like my husband and I were dating just last year. It all goes by so fast. I need to make time for the things that really matter. I need to make time for the people who really matter.
My stepdad used to have this great piece of advice about skiing. He would say that if your not falling, your not learning. This has stuck with me through everything I’ve ever done. You have to push yourself past your comfort zone, to where you may fall. It is in that spot where you learn, and grow. So, I’m not sure “having my shit together” is something I really want.
As for the success, I have found it where it matters. In my son. In my husband. In my family. In my friends. In myself.