I should thank the acquaintance who suggested this to me. The past 48 hours has shown me how much practice I need in the art of being positive. It is amazing how your world will give you chances to practice a skill when you set out to master it.
I am doing better mentally, I think. I am starting to notice the more automatic negative thoughts and addressing them. When I clean, this is huge for me. For whatever reason cleaning makes me very angry, and feel very used. As a stay-at-home mom, I clean quite a bit. You can imagine how this works out for me in terms of negative thinking. I’ve been working on this, and learning to see cleaning our apartment in a different light. Keeping a clean home for my husband and son is a way to show them how much I care about them.
When it comes to my inter-personal conversations I have a long way to go. I never realized until today how much I enjoy talking about the negative things in my life, and the negative experiences I had. I crave the ability to vent out all of the negative things that were said to me or done around me. If I don’t verbalize them and let them out, these experiences see to fester in my mind and become balls of anger that I can’t shake.
I am blessed to have more practice this evening during another social event. It is my goal, as it is every day, to only say positive things and find ways to be a positive force in this regard. Of course, if I win at Bingo tonight that would be cool, too.